I am just about to start a new round of Group Therapy for Codependency. It’s always very pleasing to meet and welcome new attendees when we start. They have a range of stories and experiences to process and share with me and others in the group. While recovery from codependent tendencies is a very personal one, sharing and hearing stories from others can be an effective way to not feel so alone with it all. In my experience, group members have usually formed a bond by the time the group is over and often keep in touch afterwards.
The important factor here is that they are ALL codependents and that is important. The dynamic of the group can be affected if they are not on the same page. I keep the groups small enough so everyone gets their chance to talk. There are solutions offered as well as the ability to share. So why do I think you should join if you are struggling with codependency? Let’s look at a few reasons.
A small group of “similar issue” members can be very effective in treating codependency. In my experience so far of running these groups, members are generally amazed and find solace and empathy with another story that is similar to their own. Codependents can feel very alone with their issues, especially in relationships and the effects of acquiring toxic shame from caregivers. Many have had no experience of healthy connection and any that they find is often transactional. Codependency, really is a mirror of early dysfunctional relationships and in group therapy, codependents can see and learn about what healthier relationships look like, within a safe space where boundaries and limits are encouraged and set. This is done with other codependents, not just with the therapist.
So, joining the group is a major step in recovery. You will be moving forward with others who have been facing the same issues, same types of relationship and the same view of the world. I will leave the last word to one of the pioneers of group therapy:
“Members of a cohesive group feel warmth and comfort in the group and a sense of belongingness; they value the group and feel in turn that they are valued, accepted, and supported by other members. In general, however, there is agreement that groups differ from one another in the amount of “groupness” present. Those with a greater sense of solidarity, or “we-ness” value the group more highly and will defend it against internal and external threats. Such groups have a higher rate of attendance, participation, and mutual support and will defend the group standards much more than groups with less esprit de corps”.
Irvin D. Yalom, The Theory and Practice of Group Psychotherapy
