society Archives - THE ONLINE THERAPIST

Therapy Shorts 97: Why You Obsess About Your Partner’s Past.

We all have a past. When two people come together and try to form a relationship, the experiences gained by both play a role. How much of a role depends greatly on the people concerned...

Therapy Shorts 92: Should You Bother Trying To Set Boundaries With A Narcissist?

I talk a lot about boundaries. I believe they are the foundation of a healthy relationship. Setting boundaries means being emotionally honest, assertive and it means protecting your emotional

From the Archives: Codependents: It’s Ok Not To Forgive Your Toxic Parents

The headline is perhaps a confusing one to anyone who has experienced trauma and abuse in their life. The helping professions are full of practitioners who deal in the art of forgiveness...

Therapy Shorts 89: Discipline And Responsibility Are The Keys To Happiness

About two years ago, I wrote a rather philosophical post pontificating about What Do We Need to Make us Happy? As I generally do, I placed this article on various websites for people to read and comment...

Therapy Shorts 82: Want A New Start? Clear Out The Dead Wood First

Change is never easy but we face it every day. For some it is a terrifying experience, for others an opportunity. We all, see it, feel it and deal with in in different ways. How we see it, feel it and deal with it will generally determine how difficult it will be...

How to Accept and Overcome Failure Effectively

Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing...

Nostalgia And Connecting With My Inner Self

I have recently been very nostalgic about the Seventies. Not with any great fondness but it was a very significant time for me. In this decade, I went from being 8 to 18 and my near adult self was formed...

Codependency: Why Red Flags Give Us All The Information We Need

In my daily work with codependents, I hear a lot about so-called "red-flags". Usually this comes when clients are describing the early stages of a relationship they were or are in...

A Successful Relationship Looks Like This

While recently browsing a national UK newspaper, I came across an article concerning a comment made by Barack Obama concerning the questions you might ask yourself about a potential partner...

Grounding Yourself Is Essential But Why?

Most of us spend time analyzing and wishing. We are the only species on Earth that can predict the future and analyse the past (as far as we know)...