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This article challenges the habit of labelling every difficult ex as a narcissist and explores whether the deeper issue may be an attachment to chaos. It examines codependency, emotional intensity, nervous system familiarity, and the tendency to mistake instability for connection, chemistry, or meaningful love in adult relationships.
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This article challenges the habit of labelling every difficult ex as a narcissist and explores whether the deeper issue may be an attachment to chaos. It examines codependency, emotional intensity, nervous system familiarity, and the tendency to mistake instability for connection, chemistry, or meaningful love in adult relationships.
This article explores the codependent fantasy that enough love, patience, and understanding will change another person. It examines how hope, self-abandonment, and early relational conditioning keep people attached to harmful relationships, and why recovery begins with seeing reality clearly rather than trying to rescue someone who will not change.
About two years ago, I wrote a rather philosophical post pontificating about What Do We Need to Make us Happy? As I generally do, I placed this article on various websites for people to read and comment…
This article explains why leaving a narcissistic relationship can feel like betrayal for codependent people. It explores guilt, loyalty, trauma bonding, hope, emotional responsibility, and the fear of abandoning someone difficult, while showing how leaving can be an act of self-protection rather than cruelty.
Codependency does not always look needy or dependent. In high-functioning people, it often appears as competence, over-responsibility and being the one who holds everything together. This article explores how success can hide emotional over-functioning, self-abandonment and exhaustion, and why recovery means separating self-worth from being endlessly useful.
Feeling guilty after setting a boundary is common in codependency. This article explains why guilt often appears when you stop over-functioning, how to tell conscience from conditioning, and how to stay steady without apologising or collapsing. Learn a calmer way to hold boundaries and rebuild self-leadership.
Discover how to break free from ‘solutionships’ and build genuine intimacy by embracing aloneness and choosing wisely in relationships.
Learn how to set and maintain healthy boundaries in therapy with practical tips for protecting your time and emotional well-being.
Discover how to set effective boundaries without over-explaining or feeling guilty. Learn to protect your emotional space confidently.
Discover the importance of setting healthy boundaries in relationships for intimacy and respect. Learn how to define your space effectively.
Journaling is a practical tool for emotional clarity, self-awareness and pattern recognition. This article explores why journaling can support psychological wellbeing, why many people resist it, and how difficulty with journaling often reflects deeper struggles with honesty, emotional expression, perfectionism and self-connection rather than a lack of discipline.
Discover why attraction is often predictable and shaped by attachment, biology, and culture, helping you break unhealthy relationship patterns.
Anyone who identifies as codependent will also know that relationships are the “battle ground” where the dysfunction takes place. As codependency originated as a broken connection to caregivers…
I often see this in therapy. A client proudly declares that they have gone “no contact” with everyone who has disappointed them. (At this point, it must be said that no contact with a toxic ex partner is recommended). They go forward with conviction but mostly that conviction is down to exhaustion and mistrust. It is avoidance instead of healing.
I believe firmly that it is only a matter of time before codependency becomes a recognised disorder. As discussed many times by this author…
It takes a lot to remove a narcissist from your life. Not only the fact that he is not all that willing for you to make that call but also the actions and thoughts of the people involved with them often make it difficult…
The typical image of a narcissist is one who sucks the air out of a room. He or she is the centre of attention and demands centre stage…
Anyone who identifies as codependent will also know that relationships are the “battle ground” where the dysfunction takes place. As codependency originated as a broken connection to caregivers…
I often see this in therapy. A client proudly declares that they have gone “no contact” with everyone who has disappointed them. (At this point, it must be said that no contact with a toxic ex partner is recommended). They go forward with conviction but mostly that conviction is down to exhaustion and mistrust. It is avoidance instead of healing.
I believe firmly that it is only a matter of time before codependency becomes a recognised disorder. As discussed many times by this author…
It takes a lot to remove a narcissist from your life. Not only the fact that he is not all that willing for you to make that call but also the actions and thoughts of the people involved with them often make it difficult…
The typical image of a narcissist is one who sucks the air out of a room. He or she is the centre of attention and demands centre stage…
This article challenges the habit of labelling every difficult ex as a narcissist and explores whether the deeper issue may be an attachment to chaos. It examines codependency, emotional intensity, nervous system familiarity, and the tendency to mistake instability for connection, chemistry, or meaningful love in adult relationships.
This article explains why leaving a narcissistic relationship can feel like betrayal for codependent people. It explores guilt, loyalty, trauma bonding, hope, emotional responsibility, and the fear of abandoning someone difficult, while showing how leaving can be an act of self-protection rather than cruelty.
Healthy narcissism is a grounded sense of self-worth that supports confidence, resilience, empathy and healthy boundaries. It is very different from pathological narcissism, which is defensive and damaging. This article explains why healthy narcissism matters, how it develops, and why it is essential for emotional health and relationships.
Why do some men turn to porn instead of leaving unhappy relationships? This article explains how codependency can drive secrecy, avoidance, and nervous-system coping, while narcissistic traits are more linked to entitlement and control. Learn how to spot the difference and use a reflection exercise to gain clarity.
Explore the complex aftermath of infidelity and codependency in relationships. Discover paths to healing and rebuilding trust effectively.
Anyone who identifies as codependent will also know that relationships are the “battle ground” where the dysfunction takes place. As codependency originated as a broken connection to caregivers…
I often see this in therapy. A client proudly declares that they have gone “no contact” with everyone who has disappointed them. (At this point, it must be said that no contact with a toxic ex partner is recommended). They go forward with conviction but mostly that conviction is down to exhaustion and mistrust. It is avoidance instead of healing.
I believe firmly that it is only a matter of time before codependency becomes a recognised disorder. As discussed many times by this author…
It takes a lot to remove a narcissist from your life. Not only the fact that he is not all that willing for you to make that call but also the actions and thoughts of the people involved with them often make it difficult…
The typical image of a narcissist is one who sucks the air out of a room. He or she is the centre of attention and demands centre stage…
Anyone who identifies as codependent will also know that relationships are the “battle ground” where the dysfunction takes place. As codependency originated as a broken connection to caregivers…
I often see this in therapy. A client proudly declares that they have gone “no contact” with everyone who has disappointed them. (At this point, it must be said that no contact with a toxic ex partner is recommended). They go forward with conviction but mostly that conviction is down to exhaustion and mistrust. It is avoidance instead of healing.
I believe firmly that it is only a matter of time before codependency becomes a recognised disorder. As discussed many times by this author…
It takes a lot to remove a narcissist from your life. Not only the fact that he is not all that willing for you to make that call but also the actions and thoughts of the people involved with them often make it difficult…
The typical image of a narcissist is one who sucks the air out of a room. He or she is the centre of attention and demands centre stage…
Anyone who identifies as codependent will also know that relationships are the “battle ground” where the dysfunction takes place. As codependency originated as a broken connection to caregivers…
I often see this in therapy. A client proudly declares that they have gone “no contact” with everyone who has disappointed them. (At this point, it must be said that no contact with a toxic ex partner is recommended). They go forward with conviction but mostly that conviction is down to exhaustion and mistrust. It is avoidance instead of healing.
I believe firmly that it is only a matter of time before codependency becomes a recognised disorder. As discussed many times by this author…
It takes a lot to remove a narcissist from your life. Not only the fact that he is not all that willing for you to make that call but also the actions and thoughts of the people involved with them often make it difficult…
The typical image of a narcissist is one who sucks the air out of a room. He or she is the centre of attention and demands centre stage…
Many codependents I work with are stuck in relationships that are abusive, unfulfilling and going nowhere. The sad thing is that they are also going nowhere and stay when they know they should logically leave…
do you smack your children? If so, you could soon be punished by law if lobbyists in EU have their way. Let me pitch in. There is no excuse in this world that can justify assaulting a child in the name of discipline!…
There are many articles around on the internet about all types of narcissism and the dangers of being in a relationship with someone who has these tendencies…
There is an old saying that goes “something becomes more attractive if it is unavailable”. This is often the foundation for codependent thinking as they try to connect with their narcissist partner and mirrors the dysfunctional relationship had with caregivers.
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