Helping you understand the patterns that keep you stuck and create meaningful change.
Welcome to The Online Therapist
I’m Dr Nicholas Jenner, a counselling psychotherapist specialising in relationships, codependency, emotional patterns and personal change.
Through therapy, coaching, group programmes and self-help resources, my aim is to help people move from understanding their patterns towards creating meaningful change.
Why is it so hard to let go after a relationship ends? This article explores attachment, codependency, nervous-system responses and IFS to explain why emotional bonds persist after separation. It shows why longing is not proof of compatibility and how recovery begins when awareness becomes practical, self-directed action over time.
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Why is it so hard to let go after a relationship ends? This article explores attachment, codependency, nervous-system responses and IFS to explain why emotional bonds persist after separation. It shows why longing is not proof of compatibility and how recovery begins when awareness becomes practical, self-directed action over time.
Can attachment styles change in adulthood? Yes. Anxious, avoidant and insecure attachment patterns are not necessarily permanent. This article explains earned secure attachment, how childhood relationships influence adult behaviour, and why developing secure attachment requires more than self-awareness. Lasting change comes through new emotional experiences and different relationship behaviours over time.
Why do narcissists and codependents often form relationships? Explore how these patterns complement each other and how awareness can lead to change.
When does helping become controlling? Explore how codependency, rescuing, over-functioning, attachment and nervous-system patterns can blur the line between support and control.
Can self-awareness become another form of avoidance? Dr Nicholas Jenner explores why understanding your psychological patterns is only useful when insight begins influencing real decisions and behaviour.
Why do we repeat behaviours we already understand? Dr Nicholas Jenner explains why insight alone does not create behavioural change and how nervous-system responses and short-term emotional relief keep codependent patterns alive.
Mindfulness helps us step out of past regrets and future worries by returning attention to the present moment. This article explores how mindful awareness can reduce stress, improve emotional wellbeing, support better sleep, strengthen conflict resolution, and help us make calmer, more conscious choices in relationships and everyday daily life.
Why do we keep repeating the same relationship patterns despite choosing different partners? This article explores how childhood experiences, emotional familiarity, and unconscious expectations shape our attractions and choices. Discover why familiar relationships often feel right, how patterns develop, and what it takes to create healthier, lasting connections.
We all have times when everything gets too much. There are many issues to face, things to do, plan and action to be taken. Sometimes, we feel overwhelmed, paralysed and wonder how we will get through…
Many adult relationship struggles have their roots in childhood, not romance. This article explores how unresolved relationships with parents, siblings, and caregivers shape attachment, codependency, boundaries, and self-worth. Discover why familiar patterns repeat in adult relationships and how understanding your emotional blueprint can support lasting change.
While recently browsing a national UK newspaper, I came across an article concerning a comment made by Barack Obama concerning the questions you might ask yourself about a potential partner…
Many people believe they are grieving a relationship when, in reality, they are mourning the future they imagined. This article explores why we become attached to potential rather than reality, how fantasy shapes emotional pain, and why recognising the difference can be the first step towards genuine healing and healthier relationships.
Just recently, I noticed that there were an incredible amount of views on a post I wrote last year. Someone on social media had read
When I sometimes take the time to analyse my patients at any given point, there are always many codependents among them. This might be because I have had my own issues with this and like to work with them or it might just be an indication of the size of the issue…
I have worked with codependents for many years and have witnessed first-hand the devastation that occurs when a cruel, self-centred individual breezes in and out of their life…
I once had a client who was involved with the most abusive, self-absorbed, self-centred, controlling man you could ever imagine. He abused her physically, emotionally, financially and verbally…
I talk a lot about boundaries. I believe they are the foundation of a healthy relationship. Setting boundaries means being emotionally honest, assertive and it means protecting your emotional
Just recently, I noticed that there were an incredible amount of views on a post I wrote last year. Someone on social media had read
When I sometimes take the time to analyse my patients at any given point, there are always many codependents among them. This might be because I have had my own issues with this and like to work with them or it might just be an indication of the size of the issue…
I have worked with codependents for many years and have witnessed first-hand the devastation that occurs when a cruel, self-centred individual breezes in and out of their life…
I once had a client who was involved with the most abusive, self-absorbed, self-centred, controlling man you could ever imagine. He abused her physically, emotionally, financially and verbally…
I talk a lot about boundaries. I believe they are the foundation of a healthy relationship. Setting boundaries means being emotionally honest, assertive and it means protecting your emotional
Why do narcissists and codependents often form relationships? Explore how these patterns complement each other and how awareness can lead to change.
Why do we repeat behaviours we already understand? Dr Nicholas Jenner explains why insight alone does not create behavioural change and how nervous-system responses and short-term emotional relief keep codependent patterns alive.
Two online therapy groups begin this October with Dr Nicholas Jenner. Codependency: Awareness to Action focuses on turning insight into behavioural change, while Narcissistic Abuse Recovery supports emotional healing, identity restoration and healthier relationships. Both programmes provide structured, small-group therapeutic work delivered online via Zoom.
The media and TV often celebrate people who are “strong”. Especially in the western world, strength is indicative of the ability to get things done, have a mindset of ambition…
If we are honest, clinically and theoretically, this type of person can change. Narcissistic traits exist on a spectrum and with long term intervention by a skilled therapist, some individuals can develop more self-awareness, emotional regulation and a degree of empathy. However, in practice, the theory doesn’t usually work because such people are very resistant to the process required to make change happen.
Just recently, I noticed that there were an incredible amount of views on a post I wrote last year. Someone on social media had read
When I sometimes take the time to analyse my patients at any given point, there are always many codependents among them. This might be because I have had my own issues with this and like to work with them or it might just be an indication of the size of the issue…
I have worked with codependents for many years and have witnessed first-hand the devastation that occurs when a cruel, self-centred individual breezes in and out of their life…
I once had a client who was involved with the most abusive, self-absorbed, self-centred, controlling man you could ever imagine. He abused her physically, emotionally, financially and verbally…
I talk a lot about boundaries. I believe they are the foundation of a healthy relationship. Setting boundaries means being emotionally honest, assertive and it means protecting your emotional
Just recently, I noticed that there were an incredible amount of views on a post I wrote last year. Someone on social media had read
When I sometimes take the time to analyse my patients at any given point, there are always many codependents among them. This might be because I have had my own issues with this and like to work with them or it might just be an indication of the size of the issue…
I have worked with codependents for many years and have witnessed first-hand the devastation that occurs when a cruel, self-centred individual breezes in and out of their life…
I once had a client who was involved with the most abusive, self-absorbed, self-centred, controlling man you could ever imagine. He abused her physically, emotionally, financially and verbally…
I talk a lot about boundaries. I believe they are the foundation of a healthy relationship. Setting boundaries means being emotionally honest, assertive and it means protecting your emotional
Just recently, I noticed that there were an incredible amount of views on a post I wrote last year. Someone on social media had read
When I sometimes take the time to analyse my patients at any given point, there are always many codependents among them. This might be because I have had my own issues with this and like to work with them or it might just be an indication of the size of the issue…
I have worked with codependents for many years and have witnessed first-hand the devastation that occurs when a cruel, self-centred individual breezes in and out of their life…
I once had a client who was involved with the most abusive, self-absorbed, self-centred, controlling man you could ever imagine. He abused her physically, emotionally, financially and verbally…
I talk a lot about boundaries. I believe they are the foundation of a healthy relationship. Setting boundaries means being emotionally honest, assertive and it means protecting your emotional
Can you imagine being locked away with another person for a number of years, isolated from the outside world and seemingly helpless to escape?…
When I sometimes take the time to analyse my patients at any given point, there are always many codependents among them. This might be because I have had my own issues with this and like to work with them…
Therapy as a couple is hard and there are few guarantees. Many factors determine success or failure. Timing, willingness, the right therapist all come into play…
Narcissists always get a bad press and probably rightly so. (At this point, we should note that we should only use the term narcissist when someone has been officially diagnosed with NPD…
Starting the process is easier than you may think. All you need to do is contact me by mail or telephone and arrange the first consultation. This is free and will allow you to present your issues.
Join Dr Jenner and a small group of other participants in a series of totally private six 90-minute online group therapy sessions.
Join me for an audio program dedicated to addressing codependency issues and recovery, offering practical guidance and insights to enrich your journey towards well-being and recovery.
Safe Harbour Therapy And Counselling LTD (2025)
