THE ONLINE THERAPIST

Mental Health Blog
By Dr Nicholas Jenner

THE ONLINE THERAPIST

Dr Nicholas Jenner

Featured Podcast

Welcome to The Online Therapist blog, dedicated to mental health and emotional wellbeing. I have been writing about these subjects for over two decades, and this site brings together my articles, podcasts, and resources on issues that affect everyday life, including relationships, codependency, narcissistic abuse, parenting, and depression. The top menu has been carefully organised to help you explore these topics more easily and find the support, insight, and guidance most relevant to your needs.

Dr Nicholas Jenner

Counselling Psychotherapist

Therapy Shorts 81: Codependency on The Good Men Project: Interview with Dr Nicholas Jenner

March 26, 2026

In Therapy Shorts 81, Dr Nicholas Jenner appears on The Good Men Project to discuss codependency recovery. This interview explores how codependent patterns form, why people-pleasing persists, and what healthy boundaries actually look like in real relationships. Practical insights cover self-worth, attachment, and small steps to shift from rescuing to

Accountability, Repair, Consistency: The Real Work After Conflict and Why Codependents and Narcissists Find This Difficult

March 22, 2026

Therapy Shorts 79: Why Codependents Cling to People Who Were Never Really There

March 16, 2026

Therapy Shorts 78: The Daily Practice of Detaching from Codependency

March 16, 2026

Therapy Shorts 76: Living with a Codependent Man Who Uses Porn Instead of Dealing With the Relationship

March 9, 2026

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Introducing The All New Free From Codependency Online Therapy Hub

Therapy Shorts 80: When the Body Won’t Settle: Simple Ways to Regulate the Nervous System

New Podcast: The Manosphere, Porn, and Consent: How Attitudes Become Relationship Damage

Therapy Shorts 77: What Are We Teaching Boys About Women?

Why Codependent Men Might Turn to Porn But Narcissists Probably Will

Therapy Shorts 75: Why Codependents Choose Narcissists and Convince Themselves It’s Love

NEW! THERAPY SHORTS

Popular Posts

Therapy Shorts 81: Codependency on The Good Men Project: Interview with Dr Nicholas Jenner

March 26, 2026

Therapy Shorts 80: When the Body Won’t Settle: Simple Ways to Regulate the Nervous System

March 24, 2026

Nervous system regulation is not a trend or quick fix. It is the gradual process of helping the body feel safe enough to come out of survival mode. This article explores simple, effective ways to regulate the nervous system through breath, routine, boundaries, rest, movement and steady daily practice.

Accountability, Repair, Consistency: The Real Work After Conflict and Why Codependents and Narcissists Find This Difficult

March 22, 2026

Conflict is not what damages relationships most. It is the failure to repair afterwards. This article explores the three essentials of healthy conflict repair, accountability, repair and consistency, and explains why narcissists resist this process while codependents often over-function within it, hoping for change that never fully arrives.

Therapy Shorts 79: Why Codependents Cling to People Who Were Never Really There

March 19, 2026

Break-ups can feel devastating for codependents because the loss is not just of a partner, but of identity, purpose and emotional stability. This article explores why codependents struggle to let go, why they chase unhealthy partners, and how healing begins through boundaries, self-focus, grief work and emotional recovery.

Therapy Shorts 78: The Daily Practice of Detaching from Codependency

March 17, 2026

article explores how daily habits such as routine, sleep, natural light, walking, breathing and healthy eating can support recovery from codependency. It shows how ordinary acts of self care help strengthen individuality, improve wellbeing and create a steadier, healthier life built around your own needs rather than others.

New Podcast: The Manosphere, Porn, and Consent: How Attitudes Become Relationship Damage

March 13, 2026

In this episode I connect the wider culture to the private realities couples live with: how learned attitudes shape sexual scripts, and how those scripts can turn pornography into either an escape (often in codependency) or a sign of entitlement (often where narcissistic traits are present).

2024 is all about Conscious Detachment…

January 2, 2024

How To Assess Your Relationship For The R Factor. The Silent Killer Of Relationships

February 22, 2021

What Our Inner Voices Tell Us… The Bad News Is… We Believe Them!

February 11, 2021

How To Understand What A Porn Addiction Does To A Relationship

January 21, 2021

Therapy Shorts 74: Living With a Codependent: Why It Can Feel Suffocating and What Actually Helps

Living with a codependent partner can feel suffocating: your mood is monitored, independence triggers anxiety, and reassurance becomes a demand. This article explains the nervous system roots of codependency, the “invisible contract” of overgiving, and practical ways to respond with clear boundaries, calm consistency, and shared responsibility.

Therapy Shorts 59: Conscious Detachment: The Missing Ingredient in Modern Relationships

Reflect on the past year and embrace your individuality. Learn to cultivate personal autonomy for healthier relationships in 2026 and beyond.

When Love Turns Into Panic: The Three Projects That Quietly Ruin Relationships.

Explore the complexities of relationships entering 2026, covering love, compatibility, and the importance of personal identity.

Therapy Shorts 60: After a Bad Breakup: Practical Steps That Actually Help

Navigate the emotional turmoil of breakups with effective strategies. Learn to stabilize, process, and rebuild your life after a breakup.

Therapy Shorts 61: The Role of Thinking Parts in Mental Health

Explore therapeutic approaches to understanding the mind and personality, focusing on CBT and the multiplicity of thinking parts in recovery.

Breaking Free from Social Media Addiction.When Social Media Stops Being a Choice

Explore the impact of social media on mental health, sleep, and personal relationships, and learn strategies to regain control of your usage.

Stop Being “Good” in Arguments: How Codependency Turns Conflict Into Self-Abandonment

Therapy Shorts 73: Why Familiar Pain Feels Like Love

Therapy Shorts 72: Stop Calling It Chemistry: When “Urgent” Is Just Your Nervous System

Stop Trying to Heal Alone: The Community Move That Breaks Codependency for Good

How Childhood Trauma Shapes Codependency and Affects the Nervous System

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explore popular posts

Are We Incompatible? Can You Really Love Someone So Different To You?

What is Avoidant Codependency?

Should your partner or spouse be part of your individual therapy and how?

The Concept of Individuality in a Relationship and Why it is Essential

Adult Issues We Should Not Be Talking To Our Children About

Narcissist Abuse Syndrome: Elements of Stockholm Syndrome and PTSD

What Does Porn Addiction Do To A Relationship?

Two Codependents Will Also Find A Relationship Difficult

Recovering from Narcissist Abuse? Recovery is in Your Hands.

There is an old saying that goes “something becomes more attractive if it is unavailable”. This is often the foundation for codependent thinking as they try to connect with their narcissist partner and mirrors the dysfunctional relationship had with caregivers.

Couples Therapy: A Codependency Case Study

Therapy as a couple is hard and there are few guarantees. Many factors determine success or failure. Timing, willingness, the right therapist all come into play…

Connecting With Your Inner Child… What It Means And How To Do It

Just recently, I have been doing a lot of inner child work with very interesting results. Touching the part of our emotional memory that has been locked away for years, can be a powerful, enlightening experience…

Identify The Rebel And The Critic And Release The Champion

When I sometimes take the time to analyse my patients at any given point, there are always many codependents among them. This might be because I have had my own issues with this and like to work with them or it might just be an indication of the size of the issue…

The Critical Aspects of Codependency Recovery

At the heart of this process is a willingness to work on oneself and to accept that co-dependency is an issue in relationships…

Recovering from Narcissist Abuse? Recovery is in Your Hands.

Couples Therapy: A Codependency Case Study

Therapy as a couple is hard and there are few guarantees. Many factors determine success or failure. Timing, willingness, the right therapist all come into play…

Connecting With Your Inner Child… What It Means And How To Do It

Identify The Rebel And The Critic And Release The Champion

The Critical Aspects of Codependency Recovery

At the heart of this process is a willingness to work on oneself and to accept that co-dependency is an issue in relationships…

Therapy Shorts 71: Boundaries Build Bridges… Don’t Be Afraid To Set Them

Therapy Shorts 70: The Boundary That Works Is the One You Can Keep

Practical Boundaries: How to Set Them, Say Them, and Stick to Them

Therapy Shorts 69: Loneliness, ‘Solutionships’, and the Work of Aloneness

Therapy Shorts 68: Why You Keep Being Attracted to the Wrong People

Popular Categories

INNER CHILD THERAPY

CODEPENDENCY ISSUES

COUPLES THERAPY

PARENTING ADVICE

If You Keep Choosing Distant Partners, It’s Not Romance, It’s Repetition

Therapy Shorts 67: Codependency After Cheating: Why Some People Stay, Suffer, and Call It Love

Therapy Shorts 66: After Infidelity: The Three Roads Couples Take (and the One Most End Up On)

Infidelity and Codependency: Why Cheating Isn’t the End of the Story (and How Couples Really Respond)

Therapy Shorts 65: Understanding Your Nervous System: A Guide to Managing Anxiety

Join Our Next Round
of Online Group Therapy

Free From Codependency

Starting November 9th, 2025

Registration is now closed

Narcissistic Abuse Recovery

Starting November 9th, 2025

Registration is now closed

EXPLORE POPULAR POSTS

Are We Incompatible? Can You Really Love Someone So Different To You?

What is Avoidant Codependency?

Should your partner or spouse be part of your individual therapy and how?

The Concept of Individuality in a Relationship and Why it is Essential

Adult Issues We Should Not Be Talking To Our Children About

Narcissist Abuse Syndrome: Elements of Stockholm Syndrome and PTSD

What Does Porn Addiction Do To A Relationship?

Two Codependents Will Also Find A Relationship Difficult

Why Codependent Men Might Turn to Porn But Narcissists Probably Will

Why do some men turn to porn instead of leaving unhappy relationships? This article explains how codependency can drive secrecy, avoidance, and nervous-system coping, while narcissistic traits are more linked to entitlement and control. Learn how to spot the difference and use a reflection exercise to gain clarity.

Infidelity and Codependency: Why Cheating Isn’t the End of the Story (and How Couples Really Respond)

Explore the complex aftermath of infidelity and codependency in relationships. Discover paths to healing and rebuilding trust effectively.

Therapy Shorts 63: If you have a Self-Centred Person in your life, don’t take this advice

Learn how to navigate a relationship with a narcissist and prioritize your mental health. Discover ways to exit toxic dynamics for good.

Therapy Shorts 57: Narcissistic and Codependent Relationships: Two Sides of the Same Wound

A clinical exploration of narcissistic and codependent relationships, how both stem from attachment wounds, and what healing through self-leadership requires.

The Real Question Isn’t ‘Will They Change?’ It’s Why Are You Staying?

If we are honest, clinically and theoretically, this type of person can change. Narcissistic traits exist on a spectrum and with long term intervention by a skilled therapist, some individuals can develop more self-awareness, emotional regulation and a degree of empathy. However, in practice, the theory doesn’t usually work because such people are very resistant to the process required to make change happen.

Recovering from Narcissist Abuse? Recovery is in Your Hands.

Couples Therapy: A Codependency Case Study

Therapy as a couple is hard and there are few guarantees. Many factors determine success or failure. Timing, willingness, the right therapist all come into play…

Connecting With Your Inner Child… What It Means And How To Do It

Identify The Rebel And The Critic And Release The Champion

The Critical Aspects of Codependency Recovery

At the heart of this process is a willingness to work on oneself and to accept that co-dependency is an issue in relationships…

Recovering from Narcissist Abuse? Recovery is in Your Hands.

Couples Therapy: A Codependency Case Study

Therapy as a couple is hard and there are few guarantees. Many factors determine success or failure. Timing, willingness, the right therapist all come into play…

Connecting With Your Inner Child… What It Means And How To Do It

Identify The Rebel And The Critic And Release The Champion

The Critical Aspects of Codependency Recovery

At the heart of this process is a willingness to work on oneself and to accept that co-dependency is an issue in relationships…

Recovering from Narcissist Abuse? Recovery is in Your Hands.

Couples Therapy: A Codependency Case Study

Therapy as a couple is hard and there are few guarantees. Many factors determine success or failure. Timing, willingness, the right therapist all come into play…