Helping you understand the patterns that keep you stuck and create meaningful change.
Welcome to The Online Therapist
I’m Dr Nicholas Jenner, a counselling psychotherapist specialising in relationships, codependency, emotional patterns and personal change.
Through therapy, coaching, group programmes and self-help resources, my aim is to help people move from understanding their patterns towards creating meaningful change.
Parentified children can become adults who feel responsible for everyone around them. This article explores how childhood parentification can lead to over-responsibility, rescuing, people-pleasing and codependent relationship patterns, and explains how separating genuine care from emotional responsibility can help create healthier, more balanced adult relationships without abandoning empathy or connection.
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Parentified children can become adults who feel responsible for everyone around them. This article explores how childhood parentification can lead to over-responsibility, rescuing, people-pleasing and codependent relationship patterns, and explains how separating genuine care from emotional responsibility can help create healthier, more balanced adult relationships without abandoning empathy or connection.
Group therapy can be particularly effective for codependency because relational patterns become visible and can be practised in real time. This article explores how groups reduce shame, increase self-awareness, strengthen boundaries and help people move from understanding codependency intellectually towards changing how they respond in everyday relationships with greater confidence.
The term “emotionally unavailable” often mislabels partners who differ in emotional expression. True emotional availability requires partners to engage with feelings, express needs, and navigate conflict. It’s vital to distinguish between emotional neglect and simply differing communication styles. Understanding can foster connection and compatibility in relationships, overcoming perceived barriers.
Children who seem unusually mature may sometimes be adapting to emotional unpredictability at home. This article explores parentification, childhood hypervigilance, nervous-system responses, attachment and codependency, explaining how early responsibility can shape adult relationships and why learning to recognise personal needs is an important part of recovery and healthier connection.
Why can a small disagreement feel threatening in a relationship? When conflict has become associated with rejection, withdrawal or instability, the nervous system may react as if connection itself is at risk. This article explores relationship conflict, codependency and emotional regulation, and explains how to stay present without abandoning your own position.
The body often reacts before the mind is aware, responding to perceived threats based on past experiences. This can lead to overreactions during conflicts, as the nervous system is triggered by cues associated with danger. Understanding these reactions involves creating space to process emotions rather than acting immediately. Dr. Nicholas Jenner offers support through therapy and his Codependency programme to help manage these patterns.
We all do it. Something happens, we find ourselves in a situation where an assumption jumps up…
Many people believe that couples who never argue have the healthiest relationships. This article explores why the absence of conflict is not always a sign of emotional wellbeing, revealing how silence, avoidance and self-abandonment can replace honest communication, and why psychological safety matters more than perfect harmony.
Explore the complexities of relationships entering 2026, covering love, compatibility, and the importance of personal identity.
Some relationships feel strongest during crisis because one partner becomes the rescuer and the other remains dependent. This article explores how recovery, confidence and independence can unsettle that balance, revealing whether love can survive without fixed roles of carer and cared-for, and whether equality can replace emotional dependency safely.
Why do narcissists and codependents often form relationships? Explore how these patterns complement each other and how awareness can lead to change.
Can a relationship become your identity? This article explores how losing your sense of self within a partnership can affect confidence, boundaries and emotional wellbeing. Discover the difference between healthy connection and unhealthy dependence, and why maintaining your individuality is essential for lasting, fulfilling relationships.
What exactly is a boundary, when it comes to relationships? Simply put, a boundary is a limit or space between you and the other person; a clear place where you begin and the other person ends…
The belief that anyone or anything external to you possesses power over you is an illusion. The only reason they can exert power over you is because there are unresolved aspects within you that enable it.
Let’s face it, therapy is hard work. Undertaking the process means facing things that have been sometimes locked away for years. Once you open that door, you are never sure who or what will come through it…
I have lost count of the amount of times I have been asked by desperate clients why they cannot let go of an abuser and a narcissist. It seems that they have been injected by some form of drug that has formed an addiction and no amount of logic, common sense or realism will help them…
At the heart of this process is a willingness to work on oneself and to accept that co-dependency is an issue in relationships…
What exactly is a boundary, when it comes to relationships? Simply put, a boundary is a limit or space between you and the other person; a clear place where you begin and the other person ends…
The belief that anyone or anything external to you possesses power over you is an illusion. The only reason they can exert power over you is because there are unresolved aspects within you that enable it.
Let’s face it, therapy is hard work. Undertaking the process means facing things that have been sometimes locked away for years. Once you open that door, you are never sure who or what will come through it…
I have lost count of the amount of times I have been asked by desperate clients why they cannot let go of an abuser and a narcissist. It seems that they have been injected by some form of drug that has formed an addiction and no amount of logic, common sense or realism will help them…
At the heart of this process is a willingness to work on oneself and to accept that co-dependency is an issue in relationships…
Why do narcissists and codependents often form relationships? Explore how these patterns complement each other and how awareness can lead to change.
Why do we repeat behaviours we already understand? Dr Nicholas Jenner explains why insight alone does not create behavioural change and how nervous-system responses and short-term emotional relief keep codependent patterns alive.
Two online therapy groups begin this October with Dr Nicholas Jenner. Codependency: Awareness to Action focuses on turning insight into behavioural change, while Narcissistic Abuse Recovery supports emotional healing, identity restoration and healthier relationships. Both programmes provide structured, small-group therapeutic work delivered online via Zoom.
The media and TV often celebrate people who are “strong”. Especially in the western world, strength is indicative of the ability to get things done, have a mindset of ambition…
If we are honest, clinically and theoretically, this type of person can change. Narcissistic traits exist on a spectrum and with long term intervention by a skilled therapist, some individuals can develop more self-awareness, emotional regulation and a degree of empathy. However, in practice, the theory doesn’t usually work because such people are very resistant to the process required to make change happen.
What exactly is a boundary, when it comes to relationships? Simply put, a boundary is a limit or space between you and the other person; a clear place where you begin and the other person ends…
The belief that anyone or anything external to you possesses power over you is an illusion. The only reason they can exert power over you is because there are unresolved aspects within you that enable it.
Let’s face it, therapy is hard work. Undertaking the process means facing things that have been sometimes locked away for years. Once you open that door, you are never sure who or what will come through it…
I have lost count of the amount of times I have been asked by desperate clients why they cannot let go of an abuser and a narcissist. It seems that they have been injected by some form of drug that has formed an addiction and no amount of logic, common sense or realism will help them…
At the heart of this process is a willingness to work on oneself and to accept that co-dependency is an issue in relationships…
What exactly is a boundary, when it comes to relationships? Simply put, a boundary is a limit or space between you and the other person; a clear place where you begin and the other person ends…
The belief that anyone or anything external to you possesses power over you is an illusion. The only reason they can exert power over you is because there are unresolved aspects within you that enable it.
Let’s face it, therapy is hard work. Undertaking the process means facing things that have been sometimes locked away for years. Once you open that door, you are never sure who or what will come through it…
I have lost count of the amount of times I have been asked by desperate clients why they cannot let go of an abuser and a narcissist. It seems that they have been injected by some form of drug that has formed an addiction and no amount of logic, common sense or realism will help them…
At the heart of this process is a willingness to work on oneself and to accept that co-dependency is an issue in relationships…
What exactly is a boundary, when it comes to relationships? Simply put, a boundary is a limit or space between you and the other person; a clear place where you begin and the other person ends…
The belief that anyone or anything external to you possesses power over you is an illusion. The only reason they can exert power over you is because there are unresolved aspects within you that enable it.
Let’s face it, therapy is hard work. Undertaking the process means facing things that have been sometimes locked away for years. Once you open that door, you are never sure who or what will come through it…
I have lost count of the amount of times I have been asked by desperate clients why they cannot let go of an abuser and a narcissist. It seems that they have been injected by some form of drug that has formed an addiction and no amount of logic, common sense or realism will help them…
At the heart of this process is a willingness to work on oneself and to accept that co-dependency is an issue in relationships…
Explore the complex aftermath of infidelity and codependency in relationships. Discover paths to healing and rebuilding trust effectively.
Learn how to navigate a relationship with a narcissist and prioritize your mental health. Discover ways to exit toxic dynamics for good.
Being in a relationship with a narcissist “type” can be hell. However, what if the narcissist is your parent and has cloned you to be a living “perfect” version of him or her? A child chosen to heal the parent’s own broken past…
This article explains why leaving a narcissistic relationship can feel like betrayal for codependent people. It explores guilt, loyalty, trauma bonding, hope, emotional responsibility, and the fear of abandoning someone difficult, while showing how leaving can be an act of self-protection rather than cruelty.
Starting the process is easier than you may think. All you need to do is contact me by mail or telephone and arrange the first consultation. This is free and will allow you to present your issues.
Join Dr Jenner and a small group of other participants in a series of totally private six 90-minute online group therapy sessions.
Join me for an audio program dedicated to addressing codependency issues and recovery, offering practical guidance and insights to enrich your journey towards well-being and recovery.
Safe Harbour Therapy And Counselling LTD (2025)
