The Only Question You Should Be Asking On A First Date

That is the person who could turn out to be "the one" or not. You certainly won't know when the relationship is young but asking the right questions will certainly give an indication.

Continue ReadingThe Only Question You Should Be Asking On A First Date

Group Therapy For Codependency Starting January 2023

Group therapy is often defined by stereotypes taken from television programmes, especially in the US, depicting recovering alcoholics starting the process by stating “My name is… I am an alcoholic”.

Continue ReadingGroup Therapy For Codependency Starting January 2023

Give Up The Give To Get. I Have And It Works

It may seem a tall order with all that avoidance going on but try it, it cant be worse than the alternative.

Continue ReadingGive Up The Give To Get. I Have And It Works

A Successful Relationship Looks Like This

While recently browsing a national UK newspaper,  I came across an article concerning a comment made by Barack Obama concerning the questions you might ask yourself about a potential partner...

Continue ReadingA Successful Relationship Looks Like This

How To Spot The Manipulator In Your Life (And How To Keep Them Out)

When used in relationships, the term “manipulation” describes activities undertaken by an individual to try to exert influence over others, frequently in a damaging or deceitful manner.

Continue ReadingHow To Spot The Manipulator In Your Life (And How To Keep Them Out)

Watch the “Red Flags” In The Honeymoon Period

In my daily work with codependents, I hear a lot about so-called "red-flags". Usually this comes when clients are describing the early stages of a relationship they were or are in...

Continue ReadingWatch the “Red Flags” In The Honeymoon Period

Codependency: Parasites, Emotional Vampires And Neediness.

I have been dealing with codependency for about 15 years and the amount of awareness about the condition has massively increased in that time. I would go as far as to say that if you grew up in a dysfunctional household as a child, there is a huge chance of codependency being a part of your life.

Continue ReadingCodependency: Parasites, Emotional Vampires And Neediness.

Coping With Change: Don’t Make Relationship Issues About You

Simply put, directly confronting a partner often leads to greater resistance, more conflict and resentment. Of course, it is easier to get angry and make accusations, but doing so rarely leads to positive, long term outcomes.

Continue ReadingCoping With Change: Don’t Make Relationship Issues About You

In Therapy, AA Is Important But It’s Not What You Might Think!

What is the point of therapy unless there is a goal for change? And who should drive that change in therapy? As therapists, are we hoping that endless navel-gazing and a non-directive approach will bring client awareness as a matter of course?

Continue ReadingIn Therapy, AA Is Important But It’s Not What You Might Think!

On Being A Therapist: Examining The Therapeutic Relationship

The boundaries in therapy should be established and maintained by the therapist and not the client. Many people come into therapy without knowledge of boundaries or how to set them and are probably used to having what few they have violated.

Continue ReadingOn Being A Therapist: Examining The Therapeutic Relationship